The “Bleeping” Divorce Judge Didn’t Listen

Don’t assume this old adage is true, “a man who represents himself in court has a fool for a client.” A pro se divorce litigant contemplating divorce can overcome all odds by learning how to fill out divorce forms and building a fact based case for his or her day in court. So why do 70 or 80 % of pro se litigants fall on their face in court? 

Why didn’t the divorce judge listen to you?  Why did he or she hand down an unfavorable decision in your behalf?  Have family laws been compromised?  Or was the judge swamped with personal problems and having a bad hair day?

These are all of the questions that keep going thru your head as you leave the courtroom. What you experienced in court was gut wrenching – it felt like you were swimming against the rapids losing ground by the minute and finally dumped over the water falls.

First of all you decided to represent yourself (pro se) and inadvertently made some major errors. You forgot a few signatures on your divorce papers and didn’t answer or understand how to fill out interrogatories. 

When one person has legal counsel and the other party is representing themselves, the pro se litigant has two strikes against them before arriving in court. Your spouse’s attorney may chew you up and render you helpless. He or she may present a dirty laundry list against you that would turn any judge’s head. 

For the pro se litigants contemplating or going thru divorce there isn’t any easy fix or miraculous formula that will insure a favorable decisions from the judge unless you’re prepared to take the time to equip yourself with information that will empower you in court.

First and foremost before filing for divorce go back a couple of years and start building a powerful case.  “He said, she said” testimony is a waste of time in court – it takes proof, hard evidence to back up statements in the courtroom.

If children are involved, the judge will make decisions in the “best interest” of the children.  Prove that you have been the primary caregiver of the children, show bills, paid receipts, time interacting with the children and show that the children have been and are your priority.  

Not knowing family law or courtroom procedure may leave you feeling victimized by the judge, your spouse and his or her attorney. Ignorance of family law or the judicial system is a feeble excuse – excuses don’t win court cases.  Sure fired ways to irritate the judge include, (1) Divorce forms not filled out correctly, (2) Emotional outbreaks in the courtroom, and (3) Disobeying courtroom protocol.

Your day in court wasn’t a dress rehearsal allowing you a second chance to present your case to the judge. What you didn’t know and didn’t do will haunt you the rest of your life.  One day in court, one small window of time to present your divorce case – how you handle this will affect you for the rest of your life.

As Always,

Little Tboca

www.caseboss.com

Divorce - Marital Assets Divided Fairly Not Equally

Divorce forms have been completed, interrogatories answered and each spouse is anxiously waiting for their day in court assuming the judge's decision will be in their favor.

Divorce decisions by the judge at times may seem unfair. It's a balancing act for family law judges - their goal is to divide marital assets fairly. This doesn't necessarily equate to an equal dollar and cents division of marital assets.

Problems arise when spouses can't seem to agree on anything especially the division of marital assets - each one for whatever reason feels they should receive the lion's share. The one wanting the big hunk feels he or she has been the biggest contributor to the marriage and therefore should get the biggest piece of the cake. They have launched a business successfully, bought their partner very expensive gifts and pretty much been the big bread winner during the marriage.

Normally property or an inheritance belonging to one spouse prior to the marriage will not be subject to division by the court unless in a moment of weakness  title or ownership was given to the other spouse. If this happens these assets will be tossed into the big marital asset bucket to be divided by the judge.

Judges would love to just take every itemized asset and divide it equally between husband and wife, but there are other considerations that he or she must factor into the formula. The parent who is the primary caregiver of the children will probably need the marital home. Health, age, special needs of one party and length of the marriage will be factored into his or her final decision.

Most judges feel the spouse who contributed to their partner's education or helped build the family business - deserves compensation. There remains a big difference between the two words fair and equal!

The family law judge attempts to divide marital assets fairly, but that certainly doesn't always mean equally. Usually when the divorce is contested and the couple has accumulated a lot of marital assets, someone is going to walk out of court feeling the world is against them.

In fact they'll feel abused, misused and be angrier than h---. Before this happens consider talking to a financial planner, tax attorney or have a consult with a divorce attorney.

As Always,
Little Tboca
www.caseboss.com

Divorce – Sole Custody of Children

Divorce law varies from state to state and so do divorce forms. Divorce decisions depend upon the type of relationship you have with other person.

Marriage and cohabitating are two entirely different lifestyles – divorce judges try to make child custody decisions based on the “best interest” of the children.

When couples cohabitate rather than marry, the family law judge in most states grant sole custody of the child or children to the mother, if she is deemed to be a good parent. There are exceptions to this sole custody law if the father can provide evidence that the mother is unstable or unable to function or perform the duties required of a parent.

When the mother isn’t in the home, has passed away or is in an institution the father is granted sole custody over grandparents, aunts, uncles or family friends. The exception to this rule is when the father is unable to provide a home for the children or suffers from chronic addictions, in an institution or has passed away. 

When deciding custody family law judges make final decisions based on the “best interests” of the children – usually the “best interests” of the children supersedes all other laws. A parent is considered to be a fit parent unless he or she is ruled unfit due to personal lifestyle or activities. 

Child custody remains one of the most contentious, heart breaking battles in family law courts. When a good parent allows anger and emotion to dictate their actions they may lose the custody battle before their day in court.

http://www.zoefamilylaw.com/blog/2013/02/texas-father-seeks-sole-custody-of-child.shtml

If a couple is married, judges at times will make the decision to give one parent sole legal custody – this allows one parent to make all major decisions about the child or children’s physical and emotional welfare. 

Often times the judge grants a parent sole physical custody of the children, but grants the other parent visitation rights unless the court feels visitation rights at this time isn’t in the best interest of the children. A judge’s ultimate goal is to allow the children to interact with both parents if possible.

A word of caution about custody battles, if one spouse has legal counsel and one spouse has opted to themselves (pro se,) the spouse with legal counsel will probably get the custody nod from the judge. Of course if the pro se litigant has studied family law, child custody laws and knows courtroom procedures they may win the custody battle – it’s a risk when one spouse has legal counsel. 

Pro se litigants must be prepared to show evidence beyond a shadow of a doubt that they have been the primary caregiver during the marriage. This takes documentation and proof in the courtroom. Child custody battles prove to be a slippery slope that can head any direction – this might be the time to hire legal counsel. 

As Always,

Little Tboca