Thursday, August 22, 2013

Facing the Divorce Dilemma - guest blogger

Welcome to James Scott, guest blogger. Excited to have James contribute to "Divorce Den."

Consider these points :-
·        
  •       First and foremost the main problem faced with divorce is that for the most part the husband and wife, or partners, are obviously very emotionally upset with the upheaval and the outcome of their decision to divorce. 


  •       No matter how hard you try once you are embroiled in the process of any break-up it is too difficult to be emotionally logical and practical. This means that neither party are able to think sensibly or without bias. You will need independent advice from someone who is not personally known, as a friend or acquaintance, to you or your partner.


  • ·        For some people the break up will mean the end of a lifestyle and a loss of their home, perhaps having spent the majority of their adult life bringing up children and building a home together.  Others may have perhaps been together for a shorter time but be involved in a binding legal business partnership, which is the main financial support for the family. All existing physical and mental stabilities in normal life are now changed.


  • ·         Until the problems of the divorce dilemma is faced with an unbiased focus there will seem to be no way forward for the persons involved which only adds to the mental anguish of the partners. Unfortunately you may be so distraught with the initial cause of the marriage break down that looking at the situation clearly will be all but impossible, you may initially feel that you just want ‘out’ as quickly as possible without considering any of the resulting chaos which may occur if you do this.


  • ·        This legally binding marriage has to be broken sensibly and fairly for both parties involved. There may be property, children, money or perhaps a business partnership all in the mix to be dealt with. This is where you have the need for support. Some people are lucky and may have strong family ties or good friends to help them through the process.  


      However more often than not, the solicitor chosen to handle the case is the only one who will be able to have access to all the necessary legal aspects which must be dealt with!
My advice therefore is to choose your legal advice carefully!

5 main points to help you through the divorce dilemma:

1.      1.   Make some personal decisions about what outcome you would like from the divorce and try to look on the ‘up side’ of the split........there will be some! Do the pros and con’s list – this is for your own personal use, once you see it written down it will help you to make further decisions.

2.      2.   If you are able to discuss and agree any part of your divorce outcome with your partner - do it. Your solicitor will be able to check out and carry forward any of your wishes and advise you on the practical side of the decisions which will affect you personally.

3.     3.    Ask around; check social and advertising media to find the solicitor who may have specialist knowledge of your circumstances.

4.     4.  Consider legal and personal financial costs – whatever legal advice you take will have to be paid for and divorce fees are now quite competitive.

5.      5.   Think carefully about this piece of advice which is given with experience:  do not consider the other party in your decisions. Remember the cause of a divorce often comes happens with the end of caring for the other partner anyway!  He/she will have their own solicitor/family/friends to support their wishes and they may not be considering your feelings and future at all.


Whatever the reason for the break up you should always ask solicitors who will be able to provide you with the correct legal advice relating to your situation. Your solicitor must have full knowledge of all the legally binding ties between both parties involved in the divorce. Without accurate information of your financial and obligatory ties with the other party involved your solicitor will not be able to help and support you. Getting this information correct is crucial to a happy outcome for everyone.

James Scott
Guest Blogger

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